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Chris Christie Should Switch Parties

August 26, 2013

Imagine you are a teenage boy who feels an attraction to other males. Imagine further that you detest having those feelings, feelings for which you would like to seek professional help to overcome these proclivities and lead what you consider to be a normal life. Well, if you are, in fact, that poor, confused teen and you happen to live in the state of New Jersey, your legislature and your governor have just done away with your freedom to seek such help.
The bill, A-3371, declares that “being lesbian, gay or bisexual is not a disease, disorder, illness, deficiency or shortcoming.” It bans licensed therapists from providing conversion therapy to children under age 18.
Rush Limbaugh’s prediction may yet come true. In 2016, Rush says, the Democrats will not nominate Hillary Clinton, Joe Biden, Andrew Cuomo or any other lefty governor or senator. Rather, he predicts, their nominee will be none other than Chris Christie, RINO governor of New Jersey.
Christie is in the process of twisting himself into a political pretzel — not an easy task for a man who, even after radical weight loss surgery undergone specifically to make himself more palatable to voters, still tips the scale at more than 300 pounds — and the manner in which Christie is pandering to the radical left tells us much about who he is targeting in his upcoming re-election bid and his probable run at the White House. The latest manifestation of Christie’s triangulation is the aforementioned piece of meddling legislation, to which he has recently affixed his gubernatorial signature.
Under the heading of the inmates running the asylum, New Jersey is following the lead of its sister state in lunacy, California, which has similar stupidity on the books. And California Governor Jerry “Moonbeam” Brown recently signed legislation giving “transgendered” teens the right to determine which restroom they want to use in school. Need I say more about the Golden State?
In a note accompanying the bill, Christie wrote that he believes people are born gay and that homosexuality is not a sin. Of course, the national media points out that this is inconsistent with Christie’s Catholic faith — a point they gleefully make to criticize the church while praising the governor.
“I believe,” Christie said, “that on the issues of medical treatment for children, we must look to experts in the field to determine the relative risks and rewards. I believe that exposing children to these health risks without clear evidence of benefits that outweigh these serious risks is not appropriate.”
One is compelled to ask if these “experts” are of the same ilk as those who told us child abuse would disappear if we simply gave women a way to dispose of their “unwanted” children. Forty years, 55 million aborted babies and a skyrocketing rate of child abuse later, we see how well that has worked out.
But logic has never stood in the way of an illogical liberal decision, and Christie tried his best to make excuses for it. Saying that he is concerned about “government limiting parental choice on the care and treatment of their own children,” he quoted the American Psychological Association, which is on record opposing conversion therapy, claiming that it can lead to “depression, suicidal thoughts and substance abuse in teenagers.”
What leads to depression, suicidal thoughts and substance abuse in teenagers are adults like Christie who assume they are capable of wrestling with such momentous problems on their own. Whom does the governor think he is to tell families in his state that they cannot seek out professional help for such a personal family dilemma? What’s next? Perhaps a law that forbids pastors and other clergy from counseling teens on the subject? How about legislation banning parents from even talking to their own children about such issues? Where does this bureaucratic bullying end?
Chris Christie has become the John McCain of the 2016 Republican field. He will pander to any constituency while acting like the gruffest curmudgeon to ever work in politics. As the late Massachusetts Senator Paul Tsongas used to say about Bill Clinton, Christie is a walking, talking pander bear.
Rush Limbaugh is right. Christie really should be Democrat. Come to think of it, so should McCain.


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Doug Patton describes himself as a recovering political speechwriter who agrees with himself more often than not. His weekly columns are syndicated by Cagle Cartoons newspaper syndicate. Readers are encouraged to email him at dpatton@cagle.comand/or to follow him on Twitter at @Doug_Patton.