Journeying From “Why Me?” To “What’s Next?”

Have you ever seen a runner who won a sprint race facing backward? You know the answer. Yet many people are fixated on their past failures, disappointments, and even stigmas. Someone has said that the past is called the past because it's the past. That doesn’t mean we shouldn't learn from the past, but learning from and accepting the past is not the same as being paralyzed by it.  

In a sense, we should never build our future around the past. Author Mike Murdock points out this concept in the life of Jesus. “Jesus was born with a terrible stigma. His mother, Mary, was pregnant with Him before marrying Joseph, her betrothed. The Bible says that they had not had a sexual relationship, but "…that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit. Matthew 1:20 Jesus never looked back. He never discussed the situation with anyone. There is not a single Scripture in the entire Bible where He ever mentioned His background or limitations.” 

What’s our takeaway from how Jesus managed his past? If you have a past stigma or incident that is not essential or significant, take away its only power: your attention. You see, there is no future to living in the past. Learn from it, yes! Enjoy it, yes! Get stuck in it, no! The past is a guiding post, not a hitching post. Learn from the past so you can live in the present and emotionally prosper in the future. 

A long time ago, my son, Jon, was a member of the Northwest Christian School varsity baseball team. The Bible verse for the year for the team was Proverbs 4:25, “Let your eyes look directly ahead, and let your gaze be fixed straight in front of you.” That’s excellent advice, especially for a group of young men who tend to forget all the good plays they make and focus on the mistakes they've made. You can’t play baseball facing backward. 

The wonderful thing about gazing ahead is that it gives us a second chance, a reset, and a do-over. It gives you a new start. Gazing ahead transports one from the paralysis of analysis to productive forward motion. Gazing ahead moves us from the 'if only' of yesterday and the 'what if' of tomorrow to the 'what is' of today. God wants us to get our direction from Him, not the past. Stuff happens in life. Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue. Even if you're on the right track, you’ll get run over if you sit there. 

It's possible to enjoy the scenery on a detour. After all, successful living is more a matter of choice than chance. Here’s my advice. Close those chapters in your life that should have been closed a long time ago. If necessary, you close those disabling chapters by forgiving yourself or others. Forgiveness is giving up all hope that the past will change. Some people need to forgive God for their past or present circumstances. Playing the victim is not fun and can be very costly to you, your family and friends, and your community. 

Have you ever heard of the word ‘beginergy?’ You probably haven’t because I made it up. ‘Beginergy’ refers to the mental toughness required to muster the resolve and energy to start again internally. 'Beginery' understands that an offense is an event; being offended is a choice. When life shuts a door, open it again: It’s a door – that’s how doors work. When given the Spirit of God, you lose the privilege of claiming, "I'm only human."

Nobody cares if you can't dance well; get up and dance again. Life is like a camera: focus on what's important, develop from the negatives, and take another shot when you take a lousy photo. The best views often come from the most challenging climb. Get in the race and, for goodness' sake, gaze forward. Don't look back; you're not going that way. And just like Jesus, never mention or be limited by your past again. 

Decide to start the journey from "Why Me?" to What's Next?" A decision is a breakthrough in seed form. You can do it. I know you can.