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To be a Good Liberal

August 29, 2011

Dear readers: I am preparing to leave on a trip to Mexico to speak for Lance Wallnau’s group. I find that I don’t have time to properly research the article I had planned to write this week. So instead, I offer you some truth mixed with humor that one of our readers sent me.

TO BE A GOOD LIBERAL, you have to believe:

  • That the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.
  • That the same teacher who can’t teach fourth graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.
  • That guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Chinese communists.
  • That there was no art before Federal funding.
  • That global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth’s climate than by yuppies driving SUVs.
  • That gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural.
  • That capital punishment is bad, but abortion on demand is good.
  • That businesses create oppression, and governments create prosperity.
  • That hunters don’t care about nature, but loony activists who’ve never been outside of Seattle do.
  • That self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.
  • That the military, not corrupt politicians, starts wars.
  • That the NRA is bad, because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good, because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.
  • That taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.
  • That Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, General Robert E. Lee, or Thomas Edison.
  • That homosexual parades displaying drag, transvestites and bestiality should be constitutionally protected & manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.
  • That standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides aren’t.
  • That Conservatives telling the truth belong in jail, but liars and sex offenders belong in the White House.
  • That the only reason Socialism hasn’t worked anywhere it’s been tried, is because the right people haven’t been in charge.
Copyright ©2011 Tom Barrett

Send the author an Email at Barrett@ConservativeTruth.org


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